Center for Mental Health Promotion
Challenges to Responsive Care
Typical challenges that parents may experience:
- Ongoing depression and/or anxiety- this can be a major problem in being responsive to your children. This can be complicated further if alcohol or substance abuse is an issue.
- Holding inaccurate beliefs about what works best for raising children- For better or for worse, your parents were your teachers on how to raise children. For example, did they typically respond to those experiences you found distressing or traumatic with with sensitive support or neglect or criticism. The interactions you experienced with your parents can have a direct impact on how you typically respond to your children. Not understanding or resolving trauma you may have experienced as a child can seriously challenge your ability to sensitively and accurately respond to your child. Highly charged emotional situations with your children can trigger responses that are harmful to forming a trusting relationship. Understanding the triggers to these emotions is critical.
The following articles may help you understand what's going on. You might also check out programs that were designed to help parents struggling with raising children.
This is an animated overview of challenges to responsive parenting produced by Circle of Security International entitled Being-With and Shark Music
Here are some additional articles and programs that may help if you think this is happening in the relationship with your children:
Overview of the Effect of Neglect
from the Center for the Developing Child- Harvard University
Science Direct
How to Break the Cycle of Trauma
Your Parenting MoJo- Research-based ideas to help kids thrive
Reenactment as a Response to Trauma
Lakeside Therapeutic Education
A Helpful Way to Conceptualize and Understand Reenactments
Michael S. Levy, Ph.D.
The Effects of Childhood Trauma on Relationships
Glynis Sherwood
Child Abuse and Neglect: How We Reenact What We Experienced
Roland Bal
The Childhood Adversity Narratives
Frank Putnam, MD, UNC at Chapel Hill, NC
William Harris, PhD, Children’s Research and Education Institute
& New School for Social Research, NYC, NY
Alicia Lieberman, PhD, UCSF, San Francisco, CA
Karen Putnam, PhD, UNC at Chapel Hill, NC
Lisa Amaya-Jackson, MD, Duke University, Durham, NC
Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs): How They Affect Health and Well-being
From Roots through Recovery
Childhood `toxic stress’ leads to parenting challenges later on
Lisa Rapaport- Reuters
What is Psychological Abuse of Children
Samantha Gluck- HealthyPlace
Child Abuse and Neglect Resources
Centers for Disease Control and Prevention
Managing Your Own Emotions: The Key to Positive, Effective Parenting
from Zero to Three
How to Tame Your Triggers Around Your Kids
Jen Lumanlan- lifehacker Parenting
from Parenting for Social Change
The One Subject You Really Need to Study: Your Own Childhood
Why We're All Messed Up By Our Childhoods
The School of Life
Does Your Own Childhood Affect Your Parenting?
Parents’ Attitudes and Beliefs: Their Impact on Children’s Development
from the Encyclopedia on Early Childhood Development
Harsh, Critical Parenting May Lead to Anxiety Disorder Symptoms
from Scientific American
If Parents are the Helicopters, Then Schools are their Rotors
Jessica Borelli, Ph.D. in the Huffington Post
from the Encyclopedia on Early Childhood Development
How Parents' Stress Can Hurt A Child, From The Inside Out
from Forbes
A Focus on Parental Depression
from The National Center on Parent, Family, and Community Engagement
from Child Trends
How Depression Affects Your Family
from Parents